There are times in our lives when, for just a moment, we miss a gear—when the path jerks suddenly, a little or a lot. We desperately try to right that wrong, sometimes spending years without ever questioning why the gear slipped in the first place. How had I become so imbalanced that I no longer worked?
We seek guidance, search for answers, even hope for salvation—yet rarely question the actions that brought us here. In marriage, we often keep moving forward even after multiple gears have slipped or fallen out of place. We pour all our energy and love into trying to get them back in line, but somehow they never quite align again. It’s always just slightly off—always catching up, always longing for how it used to be.
Eventually, you realize you can no longer find alignment under those conditions, no matter how hard you try. You begin to believe maybe you’ll always be a bit off—never quite yourself again. But then, when faced with the choice between staying trapped or wading out into the ocean, you realize there is another option.
You build your strength and resolve. You make the big, scary changes—because if you don’t, you’ll die either way, whether literal or spiritual. You never wanted to hurt so deeply, or hurt another, but you tried your very best. There is no shame in acknowledging the imbalance—for both of you. Neither is aligned. Neither is whole.
And with love, honor, and grace, you make the hard decision to right the wrong. And in that process, something beautiful happens: you remember who you are. What you are. The immensity of this life, and what it means to live each day in love—with yourself, your choices, your truth.
Because all you ever wanted was truth—to be the most divine, pure, self-realized version of yourself.
This is joy. This is peace. This is living.